


Maniac

by icedkeiji



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Blood, Body Switch AU, Graphic Description, Kinda Dark, M/M, Mafia AU, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Soulmate AU, Trust Issues, Violence, but mainly angst, can you tell how whipped i am for wonkyun, fluffy eventually, humorous tho, i'll add the tag if it comes to that, jooheon is whipped for hyungwon, mafia au within a body switch au within a soulmate au, maybe smut but i'm not sure yet, only time will tell, or maybe not, shownu and kihyun are whipped for minhyuk, wonkyun are whipped for each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:21:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22674706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedkeiji/pseuds/icedkeiji
Summary: Wonho is the top assassin in the mafia ranks, while Changkyun is the top student in his college. As different as their lives may seem, they’ve come to realize that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.Only they learn this the hard way.
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Lee Jooheon, Im Changkyun | I.M/Lee Hoseok | Wonho, Lee Minhyuk/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 1
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> welcome! one thing i would like to mention is that i hope my writing style isn’t too weird! i just write what i believe would happen next.
> 
> and another thing is that jooheon and hyungwon already know they’re soulmates, but the others don’t know their own. just a heads up!

Wonho loved this.

The rush of adrenaline as he cocked the cold weapon that fit right in his calloused hands. His precise aim that he lived to perfect. The way the bullet shoots straight through the heart, something some people don’t seem to have. 

_Like these people._

He watches as the folk around the oblong table stop chatting and stare in shock and plates shatter all over the floor.

The man on the throne plunges down on the ground, the white suit stained a metallic red. He lives to see sights such as this. Screams fill the room as everyone flies out of the dining room, now tainted with the blood of a man who deserved it. He waited as everyone ran out while servants were dialing the ambulance in the other room and swiftly leaned over the twitching man.

His eyes were furious, wondering who the hell would do this to him. Yet there was fear, and a strange sense of remorse. Fear for the light that has suddenly gone out in its peripheral, now a void. Fear for all the sins it's seen will be out to the public. Fear that the people will scream he deserved it. Even though he did.

He doesn’t deserve to feel remorse for the crimes he’s committed, nothing will turn back time. He’s stuck with the consequences he can’t even oppose. Forever will he lay down in his own felonies, and it’s nobody’s fault but his own.

He bent over and felt the cold neck, satisfied when he sensed no heartbeat. 

Mission complete.

He slipped back into the shadows carefully as the medics ran into the room to save a man who was already too far gone to be saved. He turned around and sneaked outside with his head down, sliding between big bushes before he reached a black car across the street.

“Is it done?”

Wonho hopped in the dark car, “Yes, sir.”

“Good.”

The ride was silent as the car skidded out of the neighborhood. The assassin took off his cap, running a hand through his hair. 

His boss’ assistant sat in the front, the cap he always wore covering his lidded dark eyes. Some say he’s a robot, a robot who would never show his emotions and follows all orders and barely holds a conversation. It was creepy to say the least but Wonho didn’t mind, he liked the silence after a mission.

“Boss says your next mission is tomorrow.”

Another one? Just how many do they think he can handle? But he doesn’t complain, only complyingly humming in response. 

“Here are the documents,” He reaches over the passenger seat and hands a folder over to Wonho. “You’ll need a new wardrobe and gun. Your current one is too slow.”

Wonho glared slightly, “It shoots just fine.”

“Boss’ orders.” He shrugged.

Mumbling incoherently, Wonho agrees reluctantly and pushes himself farther into the seat. He’s had the weapon ever since he could remember and it’s gone through thick and thin with him. To just toss it away for a new one he’s convinced he doesn’t need seems unnecessary. But, yet again, he can’t complain. He’d have his brains blown out before the first syllable.

“I’ll tell boss that you’ve got the information and we’ll send some servants down to help you pack. This is going to be a long mission, but knowing you, you'll get it done in half the time it’ll take anyone else. The team can put their lives in your hands, right Shin?”

He knew if he said otherwise, his teammates would face deaths far worse than what he’s ever seen. And he’s seen a lot. So he answered with the only thing he could with the confidence that he won’t get his own head on a platter.

“Yes, sir.”

Wonho hated this.

\--

“I hate this.”

It was the night of the supposed hottest party of the year, according to the gossip around the campus. Changkyun grumbled, leaning against the granite counter by the kitchen, which was now filled with people making out. Jooheon, who was pouting right next to him, nodded in agreement.

“I can’t believe they bailed on us last minute!”

‘They’, being Minhyuk and Hyungwon, the second half of their friend group. They’ve all been best friends since grade one, although Changkyun wouldn’t count Jooheon and Hyungwon as ‘just best friends’. The moment those two met, it was destiny. The only instance of true soulmates Changkyun has seen with his own two eyes. They’ve been connected at the hip ever since.

“They just so happened to get sick the morning of the party. How convenient,” Changkyun snorted. “How much are you willing to bet Minhyuk pretended just so he doesn’t have to see his ex?”

“Definitely big money.”

They both snickered to themselves when a loud crash was heard from across the room. They looked over and saw Jaebum and Youngjae from the music majors department on top of each other. For a split second, everyone just stared, waiting for the next line of action silently. It wasn’t until Jaebum grew some balls and kissed Youngjae in front of everyone. The party continued in motion as the crowd erupted in drunken cheers. 

The sudden burst of adrenaline sucked Jooheon into the crowd as his eyes flickered from the mob back at Changkyun and mouthed a ‘please help me’, almost making the boy double over in laughter. He shook his head and went into the kitchen to fetch some fruit punch. 

He reached over to grab a red solo cup from the stack on the counter next to the stove. Another hand seemed to have the same idea as it touched his own. He peered at the hand and looked up to see the owner, only scoffing in annoyance soon after. “Lee.”

“Im.”

Lee Taeyong was the most popular guy on campus, mainly due to his good looks. He was a fuckboy to no shame and it made Changkyun’s blood boil every time he saw him. What surprises most is that they never would’ve expected these two to have ever been friends. But they were. In grade two, they were inseparable. In fact, Taeyong was a part of Changkyun’s friend group. People were starting to think they were twins at how much time they spent together. But it wasn’t until grade six that Taeyong changed all of a sudden. He bailed on every activity the friend group organized and eventually cut his ties when he joined a new friend group, the popular people. He left them stranded for reasons he didn’t even think to clarify and Changkyun has hated him ever since.

“How’s your hole? Bet getting fucked in the ass constantly has really put it out.”

A fuckboy _and_ a dick. A common combination.

“How’s your head? I heard not having anything in it after a long time can cause it to shrink.”

Taeyong growled, “Whatever. At least I’m not such a pussy that I avoid alcohol.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

Changkyun scoffed. The audacity of this asshole was really getting on his nerves. “I have low alcohol tolerance, you dick.”

“Didn’t you know you can make it high by practicing? Or did your last brain cells finally leave you?”

Was that really a thing? Going over your limit to exceed a level? He didn’t know if he should believe it or not, these words _were_ coming from someone who failed art class in freshman year. Was he really going to take this idiot’s advice?

As Taeyong grabbed a cup and poured a mix of substances that would definitely come to haunt anyone in the morning, he smirked at Changkyun. “Take my word for it. Unless, you’re too much of a goody-two shoes to even put an ounce of this in your system. Your choice.”

With that he walked away, leaving an open mouthed Changkyun in the now empty kitchen. Should he actually do this? “No no no, what the hell am I even thinking?! He’s just trying to get to your head, don’t do it.” He kept mumbling to himself while glancing at the cups in front of him, death gripping the counter. He’s not and never will be this idiotic, so why is he actually thinking about it?

Taking a deep breath, he reached over and grabbed a cup, then began to stare at it. He looked insane, just staring at an inanimate object, but in his head, the cup was as alive as ever. Tempting him, reeling him into the toxic world. He didn’t want to be a goody-two shoes, but he just came off that way. It wasn’t his fault people choose not to do something with their lives besides party and be assholes, and this is a lifestyle he would never fulfill in his lifetime. But this cup, a plain red cup someone probably bought from Walmart for less than two dollars was affecting him more than it should’ve. He didn’t want to, but he needed to. The need to join such a forbidden world left him dumbfounded, he never felt so conflicted.

_Fuck it._

He snatched the biggest bottle he could find and filled his cup to the brim, downing almost half of it in one go. A few eyes trailed towards him, flabbergasted. Who knew the campus goody-two shoes had a wild side? _No one_ , and that’s what excited Changkyun the most. He finished the rest of the temptation and wiped his mouth with his sleeve as he walked into the dancing crowd to fulfill the rest of his unwanted allurement.

The goody-two shoes is no more.

\--

“I keep telling them that my college party missions are no more but do they listen? Absolutely not.”

Wonho was fiddling with the seatbelt of the dark vehicle he and his other teammates were in. Beside him was Kihyun who only rolled his eyes at the non stop complaints that came out of their teammate Mingyu’s mouth. 

Mingyu was...special. Although he was probably the most emotionless assassin in the world, he had a lot more to say than anyone else. He speaks his mind no matter what, a quality many are jealous of. Wonho likes to think that he isn’t envious at all, he’d prefer to keep to himself. But he knows that isn’t what he really wants.

“Kim, one day Boss will be right behind you while you’re talking shit. What are you gonna do then?”

Mingyu seems to ponder on Kihyun’s words as he shrugged, “Won't happen because I’m sneaky as fuck.” Which, for the record, was true. Although complaining was his thing, he would never ever speak a word near the boss or an assistant. He knows the consequences.

Kihyun shook his head and leaned into the seat. Wonho chuckled while watching his best friend silently curse out their teammate. Kihyun has always been irritated by everything and everyone since the day he was born, at least that’s what Wonho believes. The short man barely speaks before missions (unless it’s to make some snarky comment), too busy being focused on his top priority: the take out. 

He was one of the mafia’s best assassins, and rightfully so. Even Wonho believes Kihyun should be the top ranked over him. Next to Mingyu, he’s the most ruthless, merciless assassin on the team. They were lucky enough to even find him, being on the run so long has left him completely MIA. No one knows his past, as he doesn’t bother to tell anyone. But Wonho can see he’s itching to let it out, the question is when?

“Alright, Kim, you know what you’re doing?”

Mingyu nodded his head at the leader of the team, Shownu, who sat in the driver’s seat, pulling his shades down slightly to peer at the younger assassin’s response. “Capture target, annihilate.”

“Good.”

Wonho leaned over the driver’s seat to whisper in the leader’s ear, “Maybe he should have some backup, he might mess it up again.”

Shownu sighed, “You’re right.” He took off his shades and rubbed his eyes in thought. “Okay, Kim, you're getting back up. Yoo will be on your right, Shin on your left, and I’ll be on your tail.”

Before Mingyu could protest, the other three were already out of the car. He closed his fish-mouth and quickly secured his weapons before exiting to run after them. 

“We’re only here for the mission, so please, whatever you do, don’t get distracted and keep low. Understood?”

Everyone monotonously flicked a nod to their leader. Shownu felt a small twinge at his heart. The man was extraordinary at being a leader, it seemed like he’s been leading since the womb. This quality made him pull up very high in the ranks, the Boss pleased with his small selective expressions and excellent skills. But every time he gave an order, he looked as if someone had slapped him across the face. Wonho and Kihyun know the truth.

They pulled open the door slowly, immediately being blasted with a heavy bass boosted pop song shouting through the speakers. Shownu scanned the room, checking to see if anyone had seen them but everyone was too busy dancing and grinding on each other to notice. _Perfect_.

The leader quietly signaled for everyone to follow him, strolling in as stealthy as possible. They went by passed out drunks, couples against the wall, even the DJ who was too busy feeling the music to notice the intruders right in front of them. 

Either their disguise was working spectacularly or these kids were idiots. 

Wonho peered into the crowd, immediately catching sight of the target and tapped Shownu’s shoulder while pointing. The leader followed his finger and saw the target, nodding his head towards the dark abandoned corner by the stairs, a signal to hide.

They watched as the target, a five foot nine boy with silver hair, grinding on everyone, specifically this one really short black haired boy. As the boy was in his own world, the assassin’s were getting their weapons ready. After observing a sight they hope they’ll never see again, their target finally left his place on the dance floor and walked towards the stairs. 

On the count of three, Shownu had signalled them and Wonho wrapped his broad arms around the boy. 

“Not now Ten,” The boy slurred. “I told you I have to use the bathroom, baby.”

“The bathroom is the last place you’re going to, _baby._ ”

\--

“I’m going to the bathroom!”

Changkyun could barely think as his body rolled against another but as soon as he heard the shout, he was shaken out of his state. “Me too!” He exclaimed back at no one, stumbling his way towards the stairs. He grabbed onto the stair rail, continuing to trip as he drunkenly bowed in apology to the staircase and practically crawled up. Reaching the top, he suddenly realized he didn’t know where the bathroom was.

He scratched his head then shrugged, deciding to roam the halls until he found it. He began his journey by going right, his instincts overpowering his cloggy mind as he headed to the right with a strong gut feeling. This left him standing in front of a plain, white door. Voices faintly echoed through the door, making him tilt his head in curiosity like a dog. His inquisitive mind got the best of him as he leaned in a little closer and to his surprise, the door was cracked open slightly. He got a view of the scenery inside.

“Please let me go! Do you want money? Sex? Because I _can_ provide both-”

“We don’t need anything from you, _thief_ . What we really need is for you to be quiet while my dumbass teammate finds a temporary gag because he forgot the tools, _again._ ” 

“I said sorry a million times now!”

“You know ‘sorry’ doesn’t cut it with Boss.” A voice suddenly cut in. The voice belonged to a person he could see clearly, at least what he believed was clear. His hair was a fluffy dull orange, the color fading back to the dark roots. His back covered most of Changkyun’s view but when his arms came into frame, Changkyun almost gasped. How can someone be so ripped? 

“Yeah, I know but what he doesn’t know won’t kill me, right?”

“You know he finds out everything, no? You’re just lucky you’re one of his best or else he would’ve decapitated you the moment you walked in the door.”

Someone snickered from the other side of the room, “Nothing much to decapitate.”

“Hey!”

He saw a blur of a person run up to another, looking as if they were about to slap the other into another dimension when a booming voice with the tone of knives stopped their shenanigans. “Are we forgetting the mission at hand here?”

“No, sir.” The hand was put down as its owner reached into a pocket of the odd long coat he was wearing.

“How are you planning on killing him when he has no gag?” Broad arms asked.

_Killing him?_

“K-kill?! What?!” The person in the chair was suddenly beginning to sound familiar, the whiny voice he could recognize a mile away. The buff man in Changkyun’s view finally moved away and he got a good look at the victim. His eyes went wide as he silently gasped.

Taeyong?

“Now, hold still and be good for us, it’ll be quick.”

A gun was swiftly pressed against Taeyong’s forehead, sending a wave of shock throughout Changkyun’s body.

“What the fuck?!”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for graphic descriptions of blood and a panic attack !!!

“What the fuck?!”

Changkyun seemed to have sobered up the moment he realized what was going on, immediately covering his mouth and taking off for the stairs.

He heard a faint, “What was that?” and footsteps but he just kept staggering down the stairs. He went into the crowd and searched for Jooheon, who was currently passed out on a bar stool. “Joo!”

The boy was startled awake at the cry of his name, jumping up five feet into the air like a cat. “Huh?”

“Joo, we have to go, c’mon!”

“Wait wha-“

Changkyun shushed him and prepared to grab his hand so he could guide him out but out of the corner of his eye, he saw the familiar buff arms causing him to panic. “Shit, okay! New plan, Joo.”

“New plan? What are you talking-“ Before the poor out of it boy could finish his question, Changkyun heaved him up over his shoulder as best as he could and ran as calmly as possible to the door. He opened it, ready to get out of this tainted house when he heard a shout behind him. 

“Wait!”

But he didn’t wait. He took off into the night, his best friend on his shoulder, and his memory corrupted with the memories he wished he could forget.

—

Wonho stood by the door with his mouth open, calling out to no one now. “Why did they leave? I was just going to give them their wallet back.” Scratching his head, he peaked into the leather, seeing nothing but a few bucks and a student ID. 

_Im Changkyun?_

He hummed then put the ID back in the wallet. He may be in the mafia but he wasn’t a thief; the mafia _despised_ thieves. Thievery was a crime, and a major one at that. The moment you’re caught stealing, you’re dealing with the Boss. And the Boss wasn’t particularly easy with his torture methods.

Before he closed the wallet, he saw the ‘If found, please return to...’ text on the little pocket inside. He used the moonlight as his best source of light and read it to himself. His eyes widened when seeing the school name right under the boy’s address. _Hongsik University?_

He quickly put the ID back in the wallet and shoved it in his jacket pocket. He’ll just find his locker tomorrow and set it inside secretly before his mission. He nodded in agreement with himself, rubbing his sweaty hands on his jeans. His teammates finally caught up with him with sharp eyes.

“We can’t find the voice, everyone here seems to be either drunk and out of it or passed out.”

“Maybe we just heard something, the target was a little louder than usual so he must’ve been the one who said that.”

“I hope that’s the case.”

But Wonho didn’t believe any of this. The voice was as clear as day, and he knew he saw a blur of a person running away. The voice was too distant to come from someone in the same room. He shook all of the doubts away when he looked around and came to the realization about the target.

“Where is the target, anyway?”

The team scanned around them, displeased with the result as they couldn’t find him and groaned. 

“Kim! This is _your_ mission, go find him!”

Mingyu ran up the stairs, leaving the rest of the team to search downstairs. But they couldn’t find him. “Fuck! Boss is gonna kill me! For real this time!”

“Can you keep it down, you idiot!” Kihyun reached up to smack the back of the younger assassin’s head. “Everyone may be drunk but they can still comprehend things!”

“Ow! Sorry…”

“Wait,” Shownu put a hand up as a signal to be quiet. “Look.” He picked up a jacket, which caused a black wallet to fall out. He grabbed it and took out a small paper card with a ‘If found, please return to…’ text on it and an ID, one that Wonho realizes looked similar to that Changkyun boy’s. 

_Hongsik University._

“I believe that everyone here attends this college, including _the target_.”

Shownu put the ID, card, and wallet back inside the jacket pocket and tossed it on a bar stool then turned to Wonho, “Looks like we’re all going on this mission tomorrow too.”

—

Changkyun hoped it was all a dream and he’d wake up tomorrow, fresh and clear of any memories of the night before.

But it wasn’t that simple. Nightmares invaded his head this night, a normal routine for him but far worse this time. 

_The shadows imitated a demon with a sharp gun, pointed right at him. “Stay still, this will only hurt for a second,” The distorted voice cackled, cocking the weapon, finger at ready on the trigger. A shot was fired, and blood flooded his vision. His body felt light and he thought he was dead. The red substance dripped onto his hands and down his legs, and he looked up, horrified to see that it wasn’t him that was dead, but the demon. The walls started to deteriorate and crimson fluids gushed out, leaving him soaked and rotten. A sink rose out of the floor next to him, making him scramble up in a hurry to wash himself and turned on the water, suddenly hit with a blast of more blood. He screamed and flew back on the floor, tucking his knees into his chest and rocking himself back and forth._

_“Make it stop! Please…”_

“...kyun! Changkyun!”

“Make it stop!”

He sat up abruptly, panting and sweating and felt a wave of nausea run through him as he got up and ran to the bathroom. He hunched over the toilet and spilled his contents from the night before, a hand softly rubbing his back. When he finished, he sniffled and wiped the sweat off his forehead, flushing the toilet then leaning against the wall. Jooheon handed him a water bottle and some painkillers as Changkyun thanked him quietly.

“Kyun,” Jooheon sighed. “You need to see someone about this.”

“I don’t need help, I told you, I can handle this.”

“It didn’t look like you did!”

Changkyun’s eyebrows raised as he paused from drinking the water in shock. Jooheon was never a shouter, he always deals with things calmly. He was described as a person with so much patience, it scared people. Changkyun couldn’t even stand him the first time they met. He thought Jooheon was too understanding for his own good, people would take advantage of him. He knew a thing or two about being taken advantage of, events he never wants to happen again, especially not to his best friend. 

“Sorry...I’m just really worried about you, Kyun.”

Changkyun sighed, “I know. I’ll be fine.”

Jooheon nodded but continued to look uneasy so he patted his thigh in reassurance. “I’ll get through this, I promise.” They smiled at each other and Changkyun finished drinking his painkillers. He then pouted and put his hands out in grabbing motions. “Help me up?” 

Jooheon chuckled and grabbed his hands to pull him up, “Okay, you baby.”

“And what about it?” Changkyun playfully spat back, crossing his arms over his chest. His best friend rolled his eyes, still smiling as he walked out of the bathroom.

“Now hurry up and get dressed! I want to see if my baby is okay.” 

“And Minhyuk?”

“Oh yeah, Minhyuk too I guess.” 

Changkyun giggled then hurriedly threw on a hoodie and black jeans. He went into the bathroom to wash his face and brush his teeth, cleaning himself up from earlier. He fixed his hair in the mirror, taking a deep breath before whispering a quick “You’ll do great today.” and exiting the bathroom.

Jooheon grabbed his car keys and gently pushed Changkyun out of the door, “We don’t necessarily have all day, grandpa.”

“Geez, sorry. It’s not my fault you have a morning class soon.”

“Just get in!”

-

“So, you finally decided to visit?”

“We just saw you yesterday.”

“Okay and? Me and Wonnie could’ve died in these past 24 hours!”

Changkyun chuckled at his best friends bickering, setting down the medicines they stopped to pick up on the coffee table. Hyungwon was lying down on their ugly violet couch, a pillow tucked under his chin while he was in a fetus position. He looked peaceful, just laying there, eyes closed. If it weren’t for the couch, it would be picture perfect. “Hyungwon-hyung, please wake up.”

The tall boy slowly opened his eyes, groggily sitting up and rubbing the crust out of his eyes. “Hmm?”

“Hyung, you should take your medicine, it’ll make you feel less shitty, I promise.”

Hyungwon obediently nodded, and Changkyun went to feel his forehead. His hand immediately began to burn. “Holy shit, do you need a hospital? You’re burning up bad!”

The boy began to panic, gripping at his hair as he began to pace around the room. Hyungwon shook his head in reassurance, “I’m fine, Kyunnie. It’s just a fever, it’ll go down.” 

He nodded in response, snatching the medicine bottle and set two pills in front of Hyungwon. He drank them, leaving Changkyun satisfied.

“Why can’t you take care of me like Kyun is taking care of your boyfriend? At least he knows to respect his elders.”

“He won’t even call you hyung, so I’d be quiet if I were you, _boomer_.”

Minhyuk gasped then proceeded to lightly smack Jooheon over his head repeatedly. “Take care of me, you disrespectful little brat!”

“Ow! Okay fine!”

Changkyun and Hyungwon gave each other a look then laughed together. What was wrong with their best friends? 

After Jooheon gave Minhyuk some medicine and (unwillingly) laid him down on the other couch with a blanket draped over his legs, he ran over to his sniffling boyfriend, who was currently trying to keep his eyes open. “Baby, are you okay? Do you need anything? I’m here to do anything for you, I’ll even skip my classes for you!”

The lanky boy just giggled and shook his head sleepily, “No no, don’t do that for me, honey. You need education, please don’t do that for me. I’m just happy you’re here.”

They gave each other a loving gaze, making the other two boys on the other side of the room gag. Jokingly, of course. They both, in truth, loved seeing their best friends happy, so them together didn’t bother them one bit. However, they began to feel lonely and wished their own soulmate would come sooner. 

_Some day._

“Oh! Kyun!”

Said boy turned his head towards the direction of the voice, the sight of Hyungwon heaving himself up in a sitting position and reaching for something on the coffee table occupying his vision. “Here.”

The toss of an object threw him off guard as he scrambled to catch it properly, then opening his palm to see what it was. _Sleeping pills._

“Guys,” He groaned, setting the small bottle down on the kitchen counter. “I told you all I got this handled, I don’t need drugs to knock me out good.”

“Did you have a nightmare last night?” The raspy voice of his eldest friend startled him and he hesitated, wanting to say no but knowing that he shouldn’t. He wasn’t a liar and he sure as hell wasn't going to lie to his best friends faces, especially not Jooheon’s, the one who saw it with his own two eyes. “Exactly. You say you can handle them and they just keep getting worse. Changkyun, you need to talk to someone, please. I’m worried about you, we all are…”

He looked up from his hands to come face to face with three pairs of eyes, staring intensely into his soul. They were begging him and nothing weakened him more than his loved ones. Especially pleading eyes, that hurt him right where it hurts most. “Fine. I’ll find someone, I swear.”

Everyone sighed in relief, grateful that the poor boy will finally be getting help. Changkyun couldn’t help but chuckle at how caring his friends were. He was thankful for them, in many ways, but he felt selfish of their attention. They have problems too, why can’t they come to him? They trust him, hopefully, so he didn’t understand why they were so closed off with him. He wants to ask, but he can’t and he shouldn’t. He never wants to pry into things that weren’t his business, especially if they feel uncomfortable talking about it in the first place. He just wished he was more reliable, someone his friends would come to if they need to vent or rant, someone useful.

He felt _useless_.

\--

“This is useless, why did you pick afternoon classes when you enrolled?”

Wonho rolled his eyes at his best friend’s nagging, “Because I had a feeling my target was taking afternoon classes due to his excessive partying.”

His target was a tall, dark haired boy who seemed to be spending every weekend drowning in alcohol, bass boosted dubstep, and body heat. Not to stereotype anyone, Wonho knows better than anyone else to never do that. The man was literally bulging out of his shirts but gets scared at the smallest noise. Never judge a book by its cover might as well be tattooed to his forehead. But then again, here he was, assassinating people as a profession. _Way to feed into it._

He had searched around the campus with the team, but it seemed that every boy decided to look the same that day, frustrating him to no end. He would ask around but that would seem suspicious and creepy nonetheless. Not to mention how old he must look to college kids eyes wouldn’t help him keep low. Though Kihyun has mentioned that he had somewhat of a baby face, he didn’t know if that was a good thing or not considering his job. Shownu was more of the intimidating one in the team anyways.

“Feeling my ass! He probably isn’t even here today just like yesterday’s target because we shook that boy so bad last night he probably went all over campus screaming. Now we’re here looking idiotic and lost, searching for people who aren’t even here, and it’s all thanks to our dear beanstalk who’ll get his empty head blown out later for letting a target go.”

“Hey! I told you if you don’t snitch, maybe my empty head will be saved.”

“So you admit you have an empty head?” Kihyun snickered, oddly sounding like a devious hamster.

Mingyu glared at him, “Whatever, I’d probably get your head out of your ass if I were you before it gets stuck because of how uptight you are.”

The elder of the duo raised his eyebrows in question as he was taken back. “My head is up my ass? You might want to take that back before you’re the one with something up his-”

“Excuse me? Are you all lost?”

The soft voice cut the short annoyed assassin off as they gave their best fake smiles. “Actually yes we are, could you maybe help us out?” Mingyu asked the person politely, pretending to act shy to put the cherry on top. For a brief moment, the person stared them down as if wondering what these grown men who should’ve graduated college a long time ago are still doing here and Wonho felt sweat run down his back. But luckily the acting classes they made every rookie take when they joined the team paid off as the person brightly smiled and nodded. 

“Sure! May I see your schedules?”

Wonho passed his first, the person skimming through it then handing it back. “Ah, Professor Jung’s class. Wise choice,” They winked and turned around with a waving hand. “Follow me.”

-

The moment Changkyun sat down in his seat, he had an unsettling feeling. It prickled his skin, sending shivers down his arms. He rubbed at them and wondered why the room suddenly got cold, pulling out his notebook for notes. He paranoidly scanned the room, finding nothing out of the ordinary. The professor wasn’t there yet, the dance team was chatting with their legs all intertwined as usual, the sports boys were hollering with laughter in the corner of the room, and the quiet freshmen were reading amongst themselves in the front row. 

_Nothing out of the ordinary._ So why was he getting this feeling?

He cleared his throat and nervously clicked his pen, chewing on his bottom lip to pass the time. For some reason, the chills he got ran through his body in waves, bubbling at the pit of his stomach. The tension was killing him, and it was as if something was going to jump out at him like a jumpscare in a horror movie. _God, why won’t this end?_

He made the bad choice of looking at the rows in front of him, his eyes finding a familiar fluff of orange hair. His blood ran cold. His breath caught in his throat. The clicking stopped. The bubbling intensified. He felt nauseous, bile began to rise up his esophagus. Memories from the night before flooded his vision, pounding all at once at his head like a sledgehammer.

His chest rose up and down in a disfigured pattern, the clogs in his brain reeling. It hurt, it hurt bad. _Make it stop, please_ . He laid his head on his desk harshly, a large wave of pain rattling through his head. Breaths shook through his clenched teeth as he scratched at his suddenly itchy skin. _Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop_ . Something clamped down on his lungs, and he choked out a breath. _Fuck fuck fuck, not here_. Panic seeped into his skin. He looked up from his notebook, almost screaming at the sight he laid his eyes on next. 

Everyone’s eyes were on him now, staring down at him. He felt small and cold, the thick jacket he was wearing feeling thin. He couldn’t say a thing, no one did. A hand wrapped around his throat, forcing him to cough in an attempt to breathe again. A gun made its way next to his temple. It felt like hot lava against his skin, and he realized how cold he had actually gotten. He shut his eyes tight, believing that if he didn’t see it anymore, it’ll go away.

_Stop stop stop stop stop-_

“Changkyun?”

He had been staring off into his nightmare for so long that he didn’t notice the professor walk in, or the lesson that finished ten minutes ago, or his best friend shaking him back to reality for the past five minutes.

“Hm?” The room didn’t feel like the arctic, no hands or guns were pressed against his skin, and no one was in the room anymore. How long was he in a trance? 

“Changkyun,” Jooheon furrowed his eyebrows at his best friend’s behavior. “Are you alright?”

 _No._ “Yeah, I’m fine. Just a bit chilly.”

The elder of the two definitely wasn’t convinced but let it go as he saw how fidgety Changkyun was. He didn’t want to make Changkyun anymore uncomfortable than he was feeling at the moment. “Okay but you can tell me anything, you know that right?”

 _I don’t know if I can._ “Of course.”

Jooheon smiled to lighten the mood then grabbed his hand gently. “Let’s go to the courtyard, Hyuk and Won came back because the medicine we gave them seemed to help them and they didn’t want to miss any notes or exams today.”

Changkyun couldn’t help but return the smile and nodded, letting Jooheon guide him to the courtyard. He couldn’t muster anymore words out of his trembling lips, feeling exhausted. But he knew Jooheon didn’t mind the silence, he never did.

-

They arrived at the courtyard, leaves crunching beneath their feet. Changkyun could see Minhyuk waving exaggeratingly at the two and he internally chuckled. His voice had yet to return from him, being so frightened it up and left his body. Hopefully the other two didn’t mind his quietness. 

As they walked closer, he noticed how there were actually six people at the table they were going towards, four people more than the usual. Jooheon sensed his confusion and laughed, “Minhyuk probably helped out some poor lost freshmen like he always does. You know how social he is.” It was true, Minhyuk was probably the most social person Changkyun has ever encountered. They would always have to wait up on him if they were in a mall because people would look lost all the time and he still had the heart to help him. 

In all honesty, Changkyun was jealous. He wished he could be as social, not cowarding every time he sees someone glance at him. Not hoping that every time the teacher asks people to read, he wouldn’t be one of those people. Not being so scared to tell the staff at a restaurant that his order is wrong. Not be so awkward. Antisocial. _Weird_. His friends kept saying it was cute how awkward he was but he knows they’re secretly done with his bullshit by now. Quite frankly, he was too. 

Changkyun shook his head to throw the negative thoughts away as they approached the table. He glanced down at his feet to notice his shoes were untied and bent down to tie them so he didn’t make himself look extra embarrassing tripping over his feet. He felt Jooheon leave his side and assumed it was to go stick to Hyungwon’s hip. Another grin painted his lips as he moved onto the other shoe.

“Hey guys! I met these boys who looked lost and decided to help them and since they’re new, I’m their first friend! So I thought, why not let them meet my other friends- wait, where’s Changkyun?”

“He’s down there, tying his shoes.”

“Oh, Changkyun!”

Once the bunny knot on his shoelace was done, he stood back up, dusting his knees off. “Yes?”

“Meet my new friends! This is Mingyu, Kihyun, Shownu, and-”

“Wonho.”

His head turned towards the throaty voice and time seemed to slow down. Orange fluffy hair, bulging biceps, prominent back muscles. His pulse quickened.

_It’s him._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! hope you enjoyed, kudos and comments are never necessary but are definitely appreciated! <3


End file.
